Our Jewish Consultant, Rabbi Rachel

Most of you know that I am Jewish, and Chad is not.  Even though I'm not terribly observant, Judaism is important to me and I have always envisioned having a Jewish wedding.  Jewish wedding ceremonies feel very authentic to me, and I find meaning in the traditions:  standing under the chuppah, breaking the glass, signing of the ketubah, reciting the seven blessings, and of course, doing the chair dance!

 

Ketubah signing (source)

Anyhow, Chad has been really gracious about letting me incorporate Jewish traditions into our wedding.  That being said, he has valid concerns about the ceremony reflecting both of our values, traditions and personalities.  To figure out how to blend our different backgrounds into a beautiful, cohesive ceremony, we've enlisted the help of our "Jewish Consultant,"........

Rabbi Rachel, who is the rabbi at the Jewish cooperative at which I am a "partner."  This cooperative is very supportive of interfaith families, and very sensitive to the sometimes challenging dynamics that exist when two people from different backgrounds come together.  Although she isn't officiating at our wedding, Rabbi Rachel will be offering us a lot of help, from helping us pick an officiant to guiding us in designing the service, to offering premarital counseling.  Our first meeting with her was stellar.  She asked us a lot of questions about the type of ceremony we envision, and urged us to include parts of the ceremony that feel natural and comfortable for both of us, and exclude those that don't.  She suggested many ways we can make the ceremony inclusive for both of us, as well as for friends and family not familiar with the traditions.  She also told us that Jewish wedding requirements are relatively minimal.  Apparently, they are limited to signing the ketubah (marriage contract), saying the seven blessings, the bride accepting something of value from the groom, (generally a plain wedding band), and the pronouncement that you are husband and wife.

Other than that, the sky is the limit!  In particular, she mentioned that it is not necessary for a Rabbi to perform a wedding; equally acceptable can be a person who is knowledgeable about Jewish tradition.  She suggested we think of friends who have that type of knowledge we could ask to officiate on our behalf.  We really prefer this option to the alternative, which would be a rabbi we don't know well, who we could meet with a few times before the ceremony, but ultimately wouldn't have a deep, historic connection to either one of us.  Also, since we already have a relationship with Rabbi Rachel, investing in fostering a connection with a second Rabbi seems a little redundant, and perhaps not the best use of our time leading up to the wedding.  At any rate, we are happy to have her on board helping us, and very excited to begin the work of crafting a meaningful ceremony.